Pope, "Epistle to Arbuthnot," ed. Lynch

	THE VERSE
	Neque sermonibus Vulgi dederis te, nec in Præmiis humanis spem posueris rerum tuarum; suis te oportet illecebris ipsa Virtus trahat ad verum decus. Quid de te alii loquantur, ipsi videant, sed loquentur tamen. Tully.	“Pay no attention to common gossip, and don’t trust in human rewards for your deeds. Virtue’s own charms should lead you to true glory. What others say about you is their concern; whatever it is, they’ll say it anyway.” Cicero, De Re Publica 6.23.
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	This Paper is a Sort of Bill of Complaint, begun many years since, and drawn up by snatches,° as the several Occasions offer’d. I had no thoughts of publishing it, till it pleas’d some Persons of Rank and Fortune [the Authors of Verses to the Imitator of Horace, and of an Epistle to a Doctor of Divinity from a Nobleman at Hampton Court,] to attack in a very extraordinary manner, not only my Writings (of which being publick the Publick may judge) but my Person,° Morals, and Family, whereof° to those who know me not, a truer Information may be requisite.° Being divided between the Necessity to say something of Myself, and my own Laziness to undertake so awkward a Task, I thought it the shortest way to put the last hand to this Epistle. If it have any thing pleasing, it will be That by which I am most desirous to please, the Truth and the Sentiment; and if any thing offensive, it will be only to those I am least sorry to offend, the Vicious or the Ungenerous.	snatches = bits and pieces person = physical appearance whereof = of which requisite = necessary
	Many will know their own Pictures in it, there being not a Circumstance but what is true; but I have, for the most part spar’d their Names, and they may escape being laugh’d at, if they please.
	I would have some of them know, it was owing to the Request of the learned and candid° Friend to whom it is inscribed, that I make not as free use of theirs as they have done of mine. However I shall have this Advantage, and Honour, on my side, that whereas by their proceeding, any Abuse may be directed at any man, no Injury can possibly be done by mine, since a Nameless Character can never be found out, but by its Truth and Likeness.	candid = unbiased

AN
E P I S T L E
TO
Dr. A R B U T H N O T.

	Shut, shut the door, good John!° fatigu’d I said,	Pope’s servant
	Tye up the knocker, say I’m sick, I’m dead,
	The Dog-star rages! nay ’tis past a doubt,
	All Bedlam,° or Parnassus,° is let out:	mental hospital — mountain of poetic inspiration
5	Fire in each eye, and Papers in each hand,
	They rave, recite, and madden round the land.

	What Walls can guard me, or what Shades can hide?
	They pierce my Thickets, through my Grot° they glide;	underground tunnel
	By land, by water,° they renew the charge;	Pope’s house was on the Thames
10	They stop the Chariot,° and they board the Barge.	carriage
	No place is sacred, not the Church is free;
	Ev’n Sunday shines no Sabbath-day to me:
	Then from the Mint° walks forth the Man of Ryme,	district for debtors
	Happy! to catch me, just at Dinner-time.

15	Is there a Parson, much bemus’d° in Beer,	pun on poet Laurence Eusden
	A maudlin° Poetess, a ryming Peer,°	weepy — nobleman
	A Clerk,° foredoom’d his Father’s soul to cross,	bureaucrat
	Who pens a Stanza when he should engross?°	copy legal documents
	Is there,° who lock’d from Ink and Paper, scrawls	is there anyone
20	With desp’rate Charcoal round his darken’d walls?
	All fly to Twit’nam,° and in humble strain°	Pope’s neighborhood — tone
	Apply to me, to keep them mad or vain.
	Arthur, whose giddy Son neglects the Laws,
	Imputes to me° and my damn’d works the cause:	blames me for
25	Poor Cornus sees his frantic Wife elope,
	And curses Wit, and Poetry, and Pope.

	Friend to my Life, (which did not you° prolong,	if you did not
	The World had wanted° many an idle Song°)	would have lacked — poem
	What Drop or Nostrum° can this Plague remove?	patent medicine
30	Or which must end me, a Fool’s Wrath or Love?
	A dire Dilemma! either way I’m sped,°	killed
	If Foes, they write, if Friends, they read me dead.
	Seiz’d and ty’d down to judge, how wretched I!
	Who can’t be silent, and who will not lye;
35	To laugh, were want° of Goodness and of Grace,	would be a lack
	And to be grave,° exceeds all Pow’r of Face.	serious
	I sit with sad° Civility, I read	serious
	With honest anguish, and an aching head;
	And drop at last, but in unwilling ears,
40	This saving counsel,° “Keep your Piece nine years.”	advice

	“Nine years!” cries he, who high in Drury-lane°	theater district
	Lull’d by soft Zephyrs° through the broken pane,	calm winds
	Rhymes ere° he wakes, and prints before Term° ends,	before — legal session
	Oblig’d by hunger and Request of friends:
45	“The Piece you think is incorrect? why take it,
	I’m all submission, what you’d have it, make it.”

	Three things another’s modest wishes bound,
	My Friendship, and a Prologue, and ten Pound.

	Pitholeon sends to me: “You know his Grace,°	duke or bishop
50	I want° a Patron; ask him for a place.”°	don’t have — job
	Pitholeon libell’d me — “but here’s a Letter
	Informs you Sir, ’twas when he knew no better.
	Dare you refuse him? Curl° invites to dine,	a sleazy publisher
	He’ll write a Journal, or he’ll turn Divine.”°	priest

55	Bless me! a Packet° — “’Tis a stranger sues,°	letters — begs
	A Virgin Tragedy, an Orphan Muse.”
	If I dislike it, “Furies, death and rage!”
	If I approve, “Commend° it to the Stage.”	recommend
	There (thank my stars) my whole Commission ends,
60	The Play’rs° and I are, luckily, no friends.	actors
	Fir’d° that the House reject him, “’Sdeath° I’ll print it,	angry — I swear
	And shame the Fools — your int’rest,° sir, with Lintot.°”	influence — Pope’s publisher
	“Lintot, dull rogue! will think your price too much.”
	“Not, sir, if you revise it, and retouch.”
65	All my demurs° but° double his attacks;	objections — only
	At last he whispers, “Do, and we go snacks.”°	share profits
	Glad of a quarrel, strait° I clap the door,	right away
	“Sir, let me see your works and you no more.”

	’Tis sung, when Midas’ Ears began to spring,
70	(Midas, a sacred Person and a King)
	His very Minister who spy’d them first,
	(Some say his Queen) was forc’d to speak, or burst.
	And is not mine, my Friend, a sorer case,
	When ev’ry Coxcomb° perks° them in my face?	conceited idiot — shoves

75	“Good friend forbear! you deal in dang’rous things.
	I’d never name Queens, Ministers, or Kings;
	Keep close to Ears, and those let Asses prick;
	’Tis nothing” — Nothing? if they bite and kick?
	Out with it, Dunciad! let the secret pass,
80	That Secret to each Fool, that he’s an Ass:
	The truth once told, (and wherefore should we lie?)
	The Queen of Midas slept, and so may I.

	You think this cruel? take it for a rule,
	No creature smarts° so little as a Fool.	feels pain
85	Let Peals of Laughter, Codrus!° round thee break,	conventional name for a poet
	Thou unconcern’d canst hear the mighty Crack.
	Pit, Box, and Gall’ry° in convulsions hurl’d,	parts of a theater
	Thou stand’st unshook amidst a bursting World.
	Who shames a Scribler? break one cobweb thro’,
90	He spins the slight, self-pleasing thread anew;
	Destroy his Fib, or Sophistry,° in vain,	misleading logic
	The Creature’s at his dirty work again;
	Thron’d in the Centre of his thin designs;
	Proud of a vast Extent of flimzy lines!
95	Whom have I hurt? has Poet yet, or Peer,°	member of the House of Lords
	Lost the arch’d eye-brow, or Parnassian sneer?
	And has not C–lly still his Lord, and Whore?
	His butchers H—ley, his Free-masons M—r?
	Does not one Table Bavius° still admit?	a bad Roman poet
100	Still to one Bishop Ph—ps seem a Wit?
	Still Sapho — “Hold! nay see you, you’ll offend:
	No Names! — be calm! — learn Prudence of a Friend!
	I too could write, and I am twice as tall;
	But Foes like these!” — One Flatt’rer’s worse than all.
105	Of all mad Creatures, if the Learn’d are right,
	It is the Slaver° kills, and not the Bite.	saliva of a mad dog
	A Fool quite angry is quite innocent;
	Alas! ’tis ten times worse when they repent.

	One dedicates in high Heroic prose,
110	And ridicules beyond a hundred foes;
	One from all Grubstreet will my fame defend,
	And, more abusive, calls himself my friend.
	This prints my Letters, that expects a Bribe,
	And others roar aloud, “Subscribe, subscribe.”

115	There are,° who to my Person° pay their court:	there are some — body
	I cough like Horace, and tho’ lean, am short,
	Ammon’s great Son° one shoulder had too high,	Alexander the Great
	Such Ovid’s nose, and “Sir! you have an Eye—”
	Go on, obliging Creatures, make me see
120	All that disgrac’d my Betters, met in me:
	Say for my comfort, languishing in bed,
	“Just so immortal Maro° held his head:”	Virgil, author of the Aeneid
	And when I die, be sure you let me know
	Great Homer dy’d three thousand years ago.

125	Why did I write? what sin to me unknown
	Dipp’d me in ink, my Parents’, or my own?
	As yet a Child, nor yet a Fool to Fame,
	I lisp’d° in Numbers, for the Numbers° came.	spoke as a child — poetic meter
	I left no Calling° for this idle trade,°	vocation — business
130	No Duty broke, no Father dis-obey’d.
	The Muse but serv’d to ease some Friend, not Wife,
	To help me through this long Disease, my Life,
	To second, Arbuthnot! thy Art and Care,
	And teach, the Being you preserv’d, to bear.

135	But why then publish? Granville the polite,
	And knowing Walsh, would tell me I could write;
	Well-natur’d Garth inflam’d with early praise,
	And Congreve lov’d, and Swift endur’d my Lays;°	poems
	The courtly Talbot, Somers, Sheffield read,
140	Ev’n mitred° Rochester would nod the head,	wearing the bishop’s hat
	And St. John’s self (great Dryden’s friends before)
	With open arms receiv’d one Poet more.
	Happy my Studies, when by these approv’d!
	Happier their Author, when by these belov’d!
145	From these the world will judge of Men and Books,
	Not from the Burnets, Oldmixons, and Cooks.

	Soft were my Numbers,° who could take offence	poetic verses
	While pure Description held the place of Sense?
	Like gentle Fanny’s was my flow’ry Theme,
150	A painted Mistress, or a purling Stream.
	Yet then did Gildon draw his venal° quill;°	open to bribery — pen
	I wish’d the man a dinner, and sat still.
	Yet then did Dennis rave in furious fret;
	I never answer’d, I was not in debt.
155	If want° provok’d, or madness made them print,	necessity
	I wag’d no war with Bedlam° or the Mint.°	madhouse — debtors’s district

	Did some more sober Critic come abroad?
	If wrong, I smil’d; if right, I kiss’d the rod.
	Pains, reading, study, are their just pretence,
160	And all they want° is spirit, taste, and sense.	lack
	Comma’s and points they set exactly right,
	And ’twere° a sin to rob them of their Mite.°	it would be — trivial point
	Yet ne’er one sprig of Laurel grac’d these ribalds,°	worthless people
	From slashing B—ley down to pidling T—ds.
165	Each Wight° who reads not, and but scans and spells,	person
	Each Word-catcher that lives on syllables,
	Such piece-meal Critics some regard may claim,
	Preserv’d in Milton’s or in Shakespear’s name.
	Pretty! in Amber to observe the forms
170	Of hairs, or straws, or dirt, or grubs, or worms;
	The things, we know, are neither rich nor rare,
	But wonder how the Devil they got there?

	Were others angry? I excus’d them too;
	Well might they rage; I gave them but their due.
175	A man’s true merit ’tis not hard to find,
	But each man’s secret standard in his mind,
	That Casting-weight Pride adds to Emptiness,
	This, who can gratify? for who can guess?
	The Bard° whom pilfer’d Pastorals° renown,	poet — stolen poems
180	Who turns a Persian Tale for half a crown,°	2½ shillings
	Just writes to make his barrenness appear,
	And strains, from hard-bound brains, eight lines a year:
	He, who still wanting,° though he lives on theft,	lacking
	Steals much, spends little, yet has nothing left:
185	And he, who now to sense, now nonsense leaning,
	Means not, but blunders round about a meaning:
	And he, whose fustian’s° so sublimely bad,	bad writing
	It is not poetry, but prose run mad:
	All these, my modest Satire bad° translate,	bade, requested to
190	And own’d,° that nine such poets made a Tate.	admitted
	How did they fume, and stamp, and roar, and chafe?
	And swear, not Addison himself was safe.

	Peace to all such! but were there one whose fires
	True Genius kindles, and fair fame inspires,
195	Blest with each talent and each art to please,
	And born to write, converse, and live with ease:
	Should such a man, too fond to rule° alone,	fond of ruling
	Bear,° like the Turk,° no brother near the throne,	tolerate — Muslim leader
	View him with scornful, yet with jealous eyes,
200	And hate for arts that caus’d himself to rise;
	Damn with faint praise, assent with civil leer,
	And without sneering, teach the rest to sneer;
	Willing to wound, and yet afraid to strike,
	Just hint a fault, and hesitate dislike;
205	Alike reserv’d to blame, or to commend,
	A tim’rous foe, and a suspicious friend;
	Dreading ev’n fools, by flatterers besieg’d,
	And so obliging, that he ne’er oblig’d;
	Like Cato, give his little Senate laws,
210	And sit attentive to his own applause;
	While Wits and Templers° ev’ry sentence raise,	law students
	And wonder with a foolish face of praise.
	Who but must° laugh, if such a man there be?	who wouldn’t
	Who would not weep, if Atticus were he?

215	What though my Name stood rubric° on the walls,	written in red
	Or plaister’d posts, with Claps in capitals?
	Or smoking forth, a hundred Hawkers load,
	On Wings of Winds came flying all abroad?
	I sought no homage° from the Race that write;	asked for no praise
220	I kept, like Asian Monarchs, from their sight:
	Poems I heeded (now be-rym’d so long)
	No more than Thou, great George! a Birth-day Song.
	I ne’er with Wits or Witlings° pass’d my days,	would-be funny person
	To spread about the Itch of Verse and Praise;
225	Nor like a Puppy daggled° thro’ the Town,	dragged
	To fetch and carry Sing-song up and down;
	Nor at Rehearsals sweat, and mouth’d, and cried,
	With Handkerchief and Orange° at my side;	used as an air-freshener
	But sick of fops, and poetry, and prate,°	chitchat
230	To Bufo left the whole Castalian state.

	Proud as Apollo on his forked hill,°	hill with two peaks
	Sat full-blown Bufo, puff’d by every quill;°	pen
	Fed with soft dedication all day long,
	Horace and he went hand in hand in song.
235	His Library, (where Busts of Poets dead
	And a true Pindar stood without a head,)
	Receiv’d of Wits an undistinguish’d race,
	Who first his Judgment ask’d, and then a Place:
	Much they extoll’d his pictures, much his seat,
240	And flatter’d ev’ry day, and some days eat:
	Till grown more frugal in his riper days,
	He paid some Bards with Port,° and some with Praise,	a kind of wine
	To some a dry Rehearsal was assign’d,
	And others (harder still) he paid in kind.°	traded without money
245	Dryden alone (what wonder?) came not nigh,°	near
	Dryden alone escap’d this judging eye:
	But still the great have kindness in reserve,
	He help’d to bury whom he help’d to starve.

	May some choice patron bless each grey goose quill!°	pen
250	May ev’ry Bavius have his Bufo still!
	So, when a statesman wants° a day’s defence,	lacks
	Or envy holds a whole week’s war with sense,
	Or simple pride for flatt’ry makes demands,
	May dunce by dunce be whistled off my hands!
255	Blest be the Great! for those they take away,
	And those they left me — for they left me Gay,
	Left me to see neglected Genius bloom,
	Neglected die! and tell it on his tomb;
	Of all thy blameless life the sole return
260	My verse, and Queensb’ry weeping o’er thy Urn!
	Oh let me live my own! and die so too!
	(“To live and die is all I have to do:”)
	Maintain a Poet’s Dignity and Ease,
	And see what friends, and read what books I please.
265	Above a patron, though I condescend
	Sometimes to call a Minister my Friend:
	I was not born for Courts or great Affairs;
	I pay my Debts, believe, and say my Pray’rs;
	Can sleep without a poem in my head,
270	Nor know, if Dennis° be alive or dead.	John Dennis, critic who attacked Pope

	Why am I ask’d what next shall see the light?
	Heav’ns! was I born for nothing but to write?
	Has life no joys for me? or (to be grave)°	serious
	Have I no friend to serve, no soul to save?
275	“I found him close with Swift” — “Indeed? no doubt,”
	(Cries prating° Balbus) “something will come out.”	yammering
	’Tis all in vain, deny it as I will.
	“No, such a genius never can lie still,”
	And then for mine obligingly mistakes
280	The first lampoon Sir Will. or Bubo makes.
	Poor guiltless I! and can I choose but smile,
	When ev’ry coxcomb° knows me by my Style?	conceited idiot

	Curst be the Verse, how well soe’er it flow,
	That tends to make one worthy Man my foe,
285	Give Virtue scandal, Innocence a fear,
	Or from the soft-ey’d Virgin steal a tear!
	But he, who hurts a harmless neighbour’s peace,
	Insults fall’n Worth, or Beauty in distress,
	Who loves a Lye, lame slander helps about,
290	Who writes a Libel, or who copies out:
	That Fop whose pride affects a Patron’s name,
	Yet absent, wounds an Author’s honest fame;
	Who can your merit selfishly approve,
	And show the sense of it without the love;
295	Who has the vanity to call you friend,
	Yet wants° the honour, injur’d, to defend;	lacks
	Who tells what’er you think, whate’er you say,
	And, if he lie not, must at least betray:
	Who to the Dean and silver Bell can swear,
300	And sees at Cannons what was never there;
	Who reads, but with a lust to misapply,
	Make Satire° a Lampoon,° and Fiction, Lye.	criticism of a vice — personal attack
	A lash like mine no honest man shall dread,
	But all such babbling blockheads in his stead.

35	Let Sporus tremble — “What? that thing of silk,
	Sporus, that mere white curd of ass’s milk?
	Satire or sense, alas! can Sporus feel?
	Who breaks a Butterfly upon a Wheel?”°	torture device
	Yet let me flap this Bug with gilded wings,
310	This painted° Child of Dirt that stinks and stings;	wearing cosmetics
	Whose Buzz the Witty and the Fair annoys,
	Yet Wit ne’er tastes, and Beauty ne’er enjoys,
	So well-bred Spaniels civilly delight
	In mumbling of the Game they dare not bite.
315	Eternal Smiles his Emptiness betray,
	As shallow streams run dimpling all the way.
	Whether in florid° Impotence he speaks,	flowery
	And, as the Prompter° breathes, the Puppet squeaks;	one who gives cues to actors
	Or at the Ear of Eve, familiar Toad,
320	Half Froth, half Venom, spits himself abroad,
	In Puns, or Politicks, or Tales, or Lyes,
	Or Spite, or Smut, or Rymes, or Blasphemies.
	His Wit all see-saw between that and this,
	Now high, now low, now Master up, now Miss,
325	And he himself one vile Antithesis.°	contradiction
	Amphibious Thing! that acting either Part,
	The trifling Head, or the corrupted Heart!
	Fop at the Toilet,° Flatt’rer at the Board,°	dressing table — dinner table
	Now trips a Lady, and now struts a Lord.
330	Eve’s Tempter thus the Rabbins° have exprest,	rabbis
	A Cherub’s° face, a Reptile all the rest;	angel’s
	Beauty that shocks you, Parts° that none will trust,	talents
	Wit that can creep, and Pride that licks the dust.

	Not Fortune’s Worshipper, nor Fashion’s Fool,
335	Not Lucre’s° Madman, nor Ambition’s Tool,	money’s
	Not proud, nor servile, be one Poet’s praise,
	That, if he pleas’d, he pleas’d by manly ways;
	That Flatt’ry, even to Kings, he held a shame,
	And thought a Lye in Verse or Prose the same:
340	That not in Fancy’s° Maze he wander’d long,	imagination’s
	But stoop’d to Truth, and moraliz’d his song:
	That not for Fame, but Virtue’s better end,
	He stood the furious Foe, the timid Friend,
	The damning Critic, half-approving Wit,
345	The Coxcomb° hit, or fearing to be hit;	conceited idiot
	Laugh’d at the loss of Friends he never had,
	The dull, the proud, the wicked, and the mad;
	The distant Threats of Vengeance on his head,
	The Blow unfelt, the Tear he never shed;
350	The Tale reviv’d, the Lye so oft o’erthrown;
	Th’ imputed° Trash, and Dulness not his own;	accused
	The Morals blacken’d when the Writings ’scape;
	The libell’d Person, and the pictur’d Shape;
	Abuse on all he lov’d, or lov’d him, spread,
355	A Friend in Exile, or a Father, dead;
	The Whisper that to Greatness still too near,
	Perhaps, yet vibrates on his Sovereign’s ear:—
	Welcome for thee, fair Virtue! all the past:
	For thee, fair Virtue! welcome ev’n the last!

360	“But why insult the Poor, affront° the Great?”	offend
	A Knave’s a Knave, to me, in ev’ry State:
	Alike my scorn, if he succeed or fail,
	Sporus at court, or Japhet in a Jayl,
	A hireling° Scribler, or a hireling Peer,°	mercenary — member of the House of Lords
365	Knight of the Post corrupt, or of the Shire;
	If on a Pillory, or near a Throne,
	He gain his Prince’s Ear, or lose his own.

	Yet soft by Nature, more a Dupe than Wit,
	Sapho can tell you how this Man was bit:°	deceived
370	This dreaded Sat’rist Dennis will confess
	Foe to his Pride, but Friend to his Distress:
	So humble, he has knock’d at Tibbald’s door,
	Has drunk with Cibber, nay has rym’d for Moor.
	Full ten years slander’d, did he once reply?
375	Three thousand Suns went down on Welsted’s Lye:
	To please a Mistress, One aspers’d his life;
	He lash’d him not, but let her be his Wife:
	Let Budgel charge low Grubstreet on his quill,
	And write whate’er he pleas’d, except his Will;
380	Let the Two Curls of Town and Court, abuse
	His Father, Mother, Body, Soul, and Muse.
	Yet why? that Father held it for a rule,
	It was a Sin to call our Neighbour Fool,
	That harmless Mother thought no Wife a Whore, —
385	Hear this! and spare his Family, James More!
	Unspotted Names! and memorable long,
	If there be Force in Virtue, or in Song.

	Of gentle° Blood (part shed in Honour’s Cause,	well-born
	While yet in Britain Honour had Applause)
390	Each Parent sprung — “What Fortune, pray?” — Their own,
	And better got, than Bestia’s from the Throne.
	Born to no Pride, inheriting no Strife,
	Nor marrying Discord in a Noble Wife,
	Stranger to Civil and Religious Rage,
395	The good Man walk’d innoxious thro’ his age.
	No Courts he saw, no Suits would ever try,
	Nor dar’d an Oath, nor hazarded a Lye:
	Un-learn’d, he knew no Schoolman’s subtle Art,
	No Language, but the Language of the Heart.
400	By Nature honest, by Experience wise,
	Healthy by Temp’rance and by Exercise:
	His Life, tho’ long, to sickness past unknown;
	His Death was instant, and without a groan.
	O grant me, thus to live, and thus to die!
405	Who sprung from Kings shall know less joy than I.

	O Friend! may each Domestick Bliss be thine!
	Be no unpleasing Melancholy mine:
	Me, let the tender Office long engage
	To rock the Cradle of reposing Age,
410	With lenient Arts extend a Mother’s breath,
	Make Languor° smile, and smooth the Bed of Death,	fatigue
	Explore the Thought, explain the asking Eye,
	And keep a while one Parent from the Sky!
	On Cares like these if Length of days attend,
415	May Heav’n, to bless those days, preserve my Friend,
	Preserve him social, cheerful, and serene,
	And just as rich as when he serv’d a Queen!
	Whether that Blessing be denied or giv’n,
	Thus far was right, the rest belongs to Heav’n.

Notes

Nobleman: John Hervey, Baron Hervey of Ickworth, and Lady Mary Wortley Montagu. See below.
Dog-star: Sirius, the dog-star, is visible in late August; that time of year is known as the “dog-days.” It was traditionally a time when poets read their work in ancient Rome: see Juvenal’s third Satire.
Giddy Son: James Moore Smythe, son of Arthur Moore, had stolen some of Pope’s verses in his play, The Rival Ladies.
Cornus: Latin for “horn”; the name suggests a man who has been cuckolded, since cuckolds were traditionally imagined to wear horns.
Friend to my life: The poem is addressed to Dr. John Arbuthnot, Pope’s friend and physician.
Nine years: In the Ars Poetica, Horace suggested that an aspiring poet should hold on to his works for nine years before publishing them.
Drury-lane: Drury Lane was one of the two legitimate theatres in London; the area around it was notorious for its prostitutes and other low-life. That the poet is “high” suggests he’s in an attic with broken windows.
Pitholeon: Pope’s note: “The name taken from a foolish Poet at Rhodes, who pretended much to Greek. Schol. in Horat. lib. i. Dr. Bentley pretends that this Pitholeon libelled Caesar also. See notes on Hor. Sat. X. 1. I.” Richard Bentley, a classical scholar and editor of Horace, was one of Pope’s particular enemies; see line 164 and note.
Midas’ ears: In ancient mythology, Midas, the king of Phrygia, judged a musical contest between Pan and Apollo by giving the award to Pan. Apollo, angry, gave him ass’s ears.
Some say his Queen: [Pope’s note:] The Story is told by some of his Barber, but by Chaucer of his Queen. See Wife of Bath’s Tale in Dryden’s Fables.
Parnassian sneer: A quotation from Pope’s own Dunciad, 2.5.
C–lly: Colley Cibber, playwright and poet laureate. Pope attacked him in many poems, including the revised version of The Dunciad.
H—ley: John Henley, a preacher who had delivered a sermon on butchers.
Bavius: A bad Roman poet who attacked Horace and Virgil.
Ph—ps: Ambrose Philips, a poet often attacked by Pope, who called him “Namby Pamby” — the origin of the term.
Sapho: The real Sappho was a seventh-century BCE female poet from Lesbia in Greece who wrote erotic poems addressed to women. Pope applies the name here to Lady Mary Wortley Montagu, once a friend, later a bitter enemy.
Grubstreet: Grub Street was a section of London in which poor writers tried to eke out a living. As Wall Street now means finance and Fleet Street means journalism, Grub Street came to stand for the whole milieu of hack writing. Johnson defines it as “Originally the name of a street in Moorfields in London, much inhabited by writers of small histories, dictionaries, and temporary poems; whence any mean production is called grubstreet.”

Prints my Letters: Curll had published a pirated edition of Pope’s correspondence. The story is more complicated than it seems, though, since Pope apparently manipulated him into publishing them.
Subscribe, subscribe: Publication by subscription was becoming common. Writers would announce a project and seek support before the work was finished. Those who paid in advance would see their names listed in the book. Pope was one of the first to make a fortune from this method of publication in his translation of Homer.
Short: Pope was very short — four foot six. He suffered from tuberculosis of the spine, which also gave him a bad hunchback.
Ovid’s nose: Ovid’s name was Publius Ovidius Naso; naso is Latin for “nose.”
This long disease: Pope was in fact plagued by many diseases throughout his life.
Granville . . . St. John: A catalogue of Pope’s friends and supporters.
great Dryden’s friends before: [Pope’s note:] All these were Patrons or Admirers of Mr. Dryden, tho’a scandalous Libel against him, entituled, Dryden’s Satyr to his Muse, has been printed in the Name of the Lord Somers, of which he was wholly ignorant.
Burnets, Oldmixons, and Cooks: [Pope’s note:] Authors of secret and scandalous History.
Fanny: Lord Hervey, discussed below in lines 305 and following.
Gildon: Charles Gildon, a critic and poet who had attacked Pope.
Dennis: John Dennis, another critic and poet who attacked Pope.
Slashing B—ley down to pidling T—ds: Richard Bentley was England’s greatest classical scholar and one of Pope’s enemies. “Tibbald” is Lewis Theobald, who had viciously attacked Pope’s edition of Shakespeare in a book called Shakespeare Restored. Pope gave both of them prominent places in his Dunciad.
Persian Tale: Pope’s note: “Ambrose Philips translated a book called the Persian Tales.” Half a crown was the usual charge for a prostitute.
Tate: Nahum Tate, a poet and playwright most famous today for his happy-ending version of King Lear (1681), who also did a translation of the Psalms.
Addison: Joseph Addison, co-author of The Spectator, was originally one of Pope’s friends. They had a falling out, not only over literary matters (Addison preferred the Homer translation by Tickell to the one by Pope) but also over politics. The next verse paragraph, with its satire on “Atticus,” is an extended attack on Addison.
Cato: Addison wrote a play called Cato, a huge success. When he and Pope were on good terms, Pope contributed a verse prologue to the play.
Claps: Books were advertised by having their title pages pasted up like posters, known as “claps.” Rubric means “in red,” a color sometimes used on title pages.
George: King George II. One of the functions of the poet laureate — a position then held by Colley Cibber — was to write celebratory odes on the king’s birthday. He here suggests that the king ignores such tributes.
Bufo: A caricature of a literary patron. Castalia is a spring on Parnassus (the “forked hill” in the next line), and the Castalian state therefore represents poetry.
Puff: “To swell or blow up with praise” (Johnson). It was common to write fulsome tributes to patrons in the works they supported.
Pindar stood without a head: Pope’s note: “Ridicules the affectation of antiquaries, who frequently exhibit the headless trunks and terms of statues for Plato, Homer, Pindar, etc.”
Help’d to bury: Pope’s note: “Mr. Dryden, after having liv’d in Exigencies, had a magnificent Funeral bestow’d upon him by the contributions of several Persons of Quality.”
Gay: A pun — not only left him happy, but left him John Gay, Pope’s friend, best known today as the author of The Beggar’s Opera.
Queensb’ry: Charles Douglas, 3d Duke of Queensbury, paid for a monument to Gay in Westminster Abbey. Pope provided the epitaph.
To live and die: See Sir John Denham’s poem, “Of Prudence”: “Learn to live well, that thou may’st die so too;/ To live and die is all we have to do.”
Balbus: The name of a Roman lawyer. It refers here to George Hay, 7th Earl of Kinnoul, a former friend of Pope.
Sir Will. or Bubo: “Sir Will.” is Sir William Yonge, a politician whom Pope disliked. “Bubo,” Latin for “owl,” refers to George Bubb Dodington, notorious for his lack of taste. The word also suggests “booby,” which Johnson defines as “A dull, heavy, stupid fellow; a lubber.”
Cannons: Cannons is the estate of the Duke of Chandos. In his Epistle to Burlington, Pope attacked “Timon’s villa” as a model of bad taste. Many readers insisted this was an attack on Chandos, but Pope denied it.
Sporus: Sporus was a favorite and lover of the emperor Nero. Pope uses the name for Lord Hervey (pronounced Harvey), a former friend of Pope, who was rumored to be bisexual.
At the ear of Eve: Pope’s note: “In the fourth Book of Milton [Paradise Lost, 4.800], the Devil is represented in his Posture. It is but justice to own that the Hint of Eve and the Serpent was taken from the Verses on the Imitator of Horace.” Eve is here Queen Caroline, whom Hervey served. The Verses were a satirical attack on Pope written by Hervey.
Stoop: A term from falconry.
Pictur’d Shape: Referring to the satirical illustrations of Pope’s deformed body that had appeared in several publications.
Japhet: Japhet Crook, a forger.
Knight of the post: “A hireling evidence” (Johnson) — that is, someone paid to give false evidence in court.
Lose his own: One penalty for libel and other offenses — and a fate suffered by Japhet Crook — was to be set in the stocks and to have one’s ears cut off.
Welsted: Pope’s note: “This man had the impudence to tell in print that Mr. P. had occasioned a Lady’s death, and to name a person he never heard of. He also published that he had libelled the Duke of Chandos; with whom (it was added) that he had lived in familiarity, and received from him a present of five hundred pounds; the false-hood of both which is known to his Grace. Mr. P. never received any present farther than the subscription for Homer, from him, or from Any great Man whatsoever.”
Budgel: Eustace Budgell. Pope’s note: “Budgel in a Weekly Pamphlet call’d the Bee, bestow’d much abuse on him [Pope], in the imagination that he writ some things about the Last Will of Dr. Tindal, in the Grubstreet Journal; a Paper wherein he never had the least Hand, Direction, or Supervisal, nor the least knowledge of its Authors. He took no notice of so frantick an Abuse; and expected that any man who knew himself Author of what he was slander’d for, would have justify’d him on that Article.”
Two Curls: Pope’s note: “In some of Curl’s and other pamphlets, Mr. Pope’s father was said to be a Mechanic [i.e., an unskilled workman], a Hatter, a Farmer, nay a Bankrupt. But, what is stranger, a Nobleman [i.e., Hervey] (if such a Reflection can be thought to come from a Nobleman) has dropt an allusion to this pitiful Untruth, in his Epistle to a Doctor of Divinity: And the following line,

Hard as thy Heart, and as thy Birth Obscure,

had fallen from a like Courtly pen, in certain Verses to the Imitator of Horace. Mr. Pope’s father was of a Gentleman’s family in Oxfordshire, the Head of which was the Earl of Downe, whose sole Heiress married the Earl of Lindsey. — His Mother was the Daughter of William Turnor, Esq; of York: She had three Brothers, one of whom was kill’d, another died in the Service of King Charles, the eldest following his Fortunes, and becoming a General Officer in Spain, left her what Estate remain’d after the Sequestrations and Forfeitures of her family — Mr. Pope died in 1717, aged 75; She in 1733, aged 93, a very few weeks after this poem was finished. The following inscription was placed by their son on their Monument, in the Parish of Twickenham, in Middlesex.

D.O.M.
Alexandro . Pope . Viro . Innocvo
Probo . Pio . Qvi . Vixit . Annos . LXXV . Ob . MDCCXVCII
Et . Edithæ . Conivgi . Incvlpabili . Pientissimæ
Qvae . Vixit . Annos . XCIII . Ob . MDCCXXXIII
Parentibvs . Benemerentibvs . Filivs . Fecit . Et . Sibi”
Bestia: Lucius Calpurnius Bestia, a roman consul who was bribed to enter into a dishonorable peace. Pope is probably alluding to the Duke of Marlborough.
Nor dar’d an Oath, nor hazarded a Lye: Pope was a Roman Catholic, and Catholics were forced to take oaths or be deprived of many of their civil rights. Many simply took the oaths and lied; Pope and his father refused, and suffered the consequences.
Serv’d a Queen: Arbuthnot had been a courtier to Queen Anne, but after George I took the throne in 1714 he lost his position.

An Epistle to Arbuthnot

By Alexander Pope

Edited and annotated by Jack Lynch

THE VERSE

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AN
E P I S T L E
TO
Dr. A R B U T H N O T.

Notes

An Epistle to Arbuthnot

By Alexander Pope

Edited and annotated by Jack Lynch

THE VERSE

Advertisement

AN E P I S T L E TO Dr. A R B U T H N O T.

Notes

AN
E P I S T L E
TO
Dr. A R B U T H N O T.